With George Clooney about to become a dad of twins, one full-time father reveals what it’s REALLY like as a parent of double trouble

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[size=36]With George Clooney about to become a dad of twins, one full-time father reveals what it’s REALLY like as a parent of double trouble[/size]

Robin Flavell, 47,  says that for ordinary parents who don't have a "fleet of nannies", bringing up twins is a military operation

As told to Eimear O'Hagan
21st May 2017, 

“EXHILARATING, exhausting, overwhelming and a huge physical and practical challenge – that’s just a rough idea of what it’s like to have twins.
For anyone who thinks one baby is hard, you haven’t a clue!


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In 2012, Robin and his wife Jill had twins, Charlotte and Martha
That’s why when I heard in February that George Clooney’s wife Amal is expecting twins, I had a wry little chuckle.
He has no idea how much his polished A-list life is about to be turned upside down.
I’ll never forget the moment I saw two little blobs dancing about on the ultrasound monitor when my wife Jill, a 42-year-old journalist, had her first scan at nine weeks.


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George and Amal Clooney are expecting twins
My eyes widened seeing the two heartbeats, and all I felt was joy.
Even though twins run in my family, I just didn’t think it would happen to us, but we were so excited. We didn’t have a clue.
Even before they were born, twin chaos began.
Everything we needed had to be bought twice – from cribs and car seats to bouncy chairs.


Our two-bed basement flat in Crystal Palace, London, soon looked like a Mothercare depot and our disposable income vanished as we stockpiled nappies and wipes as if Armageddon was coming.
How on earth could two babies need so much I wondered, as yet another delivery from Amazon arrived.
The pram we bought was like a space-age tank and required an engineering degree to put it together.
As Jill’s bump grew, I became more excited, but it was hard to watch her suffer the physical effects of pregnancy.
She had very bad morning sickness until around 16 weeks, then sciatica towards the end, which was extremely painful.


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Jill suffered with the physical effects of pregnancy such as morning sickness and sciatica
Our twins shared a single placenta and sac, so it was deemed a very high-risk pregnancy, and in August 2012, when Jill was 33 weeks, doctors delivered our babies by Caesarean section at King’s College Hospital, London.
Charlotte arrived first, weighing 4lb 7oz, then Martha a minute after, at 3lb 4oz.
They were so tiny, but hearing their cries was a huge relief – they’d made it safely into the world.
However, the girls were quickly whisked off to the special care baby unit, and it wasn’t until they were five days old that I was able to hold them for the first time.
Cradling my perfect babies, that sense of responsibility new parents talk about hit me twice over.


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The twins at nine months
These were my daughters and it was up to me and Jill to care for them.
It was both mind-blowing and daunting.
The girls spent just over two weeks in the baby unit before we could bring them home – and that was my introduction to the logistical challenges of twins.
Puffing and panting as I carried two car seats and the enormous nappy bag from our car and down the steps to our flat, I wondered how we’d cope as they grew.
I know George will probably have a fleet of nannies already employed, but for ordinary twin parents, the first six months are really all about survival.


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Robin admits that bringing them up for the first six months was a struggle
Just keeping them alive is a military operation.
It’s a relentless cycle of feeds, burps, changes, sleeps – in-between putting washes on and trying to occasionally eat and have a short kip yourself.
Jill and I kept a diary in the early months, noting down all the girls’ feeds, changes and naps because we were both so sleep- deprived that we couldn’t remember who needed what next.
We still take a look at it, laughing at our shaky 4am handwriting.
After three weeks I returned to my job as an event service manager with St John Ambulance.


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Martha and Charlotte at a fire station open day in 2016
As much as work was a lot easier than caring for twins, I felt guilty that I couldn’t help Jill more and I missed the girls terribly.
At home, I loved to lie on the sofa with both girls on my chest, and even today they find comfort in that position.
When Martha and Charlotte were nine months old, we decided to move from London to Yorkshire to be near Jill’s parents, and I gave up my job to be a full-time dad.
I quickly learned what Jill had known for months – twins are like a circus act and fascinate people.
But while at first I loved showing the girls off, it did get annoying.


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The family on holiday last year
I also had to build up a tolerance to well-meaning but overused expressions such as: ‘Did you buy one get one free?’ While my stock response to: ‘Are they identical?’ was: ‘Yes, but one is more identical than the other.’
However, just when we thought we’d mastered the whole twin parenting malarkey, the girls became toddlers and all hell broke loose.
They walked soon after their first birthday and I had to develop eyes in the back of my head, as one would make a run for the front door while the other targeted the stairs.
I also quickly learned that silence isn’t good – it means trouble is afoot.
I lost count of the number of times I found one climbing perilously on furniture.
But, chaos aside, it’s been amazing witnessing their bond deepen.


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The girls are very close
From a very early age they’ve insisted on sleeping together and we’d find them mirroring one another’s position, like two little bookends.
Both my girls have strong personalities.
Martha is outspoken and quirky, while Charlotte is more passive, but can have her temperamental moments.
There’s such a sense of teamwork, and seeing them discovering the world together is so special because I know they’ll always have each other, long after Jill and I are gone.
Thankfully, they haven’t worked out yet how to use their twin-ness to play tricks on me, but my sister – who also has twins – warned me those days won’t be far off!
Now they’re four, life is a bit easier. They don’t need to be carried, they (mostly) sleep all night and we’ve ditched the huge pram, although now our house is a junkyard of plastic toys.
People say to me: ‘At least you’ve got all the hard stuff out of the way in one go.’


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Charlotte, Jill, Robin and Martha at home for Christmas in 2016
And in part that’s true – we’re not planning to have more children, so don’t have to worry about potty training again. But it’s bittersweet cramming all the milestones into one go – which I sometimes miss, as I’m just so busy surviving it all.
Like George, who’s 56, I came to fatherhood later in life and I think that’s been a benefit.
I’d had years of freedom and was ready for the next chapter, so I’ve never resented such a dramatic lifestyle change.
The disadvantage, as he will discover (although he looks in better shape than me!), is that the older you are, the more tiring it is.
It used to be my back aching from carrying the girls, now it’s my throat from shouting!
But I don’t feel jealous of people who are bringing up one child at a time, as I wouldn’t swap my girls for the world.
Yes, it’s double the work and stress, but it’s double the love and fun, too.