New Years Resolutions

Crikey! It's almost Christmas yes, but even more so, it's almost the end of another year!  I can't believe it's almost 2014 and I still haven't gotten half my list of to do's from 2013 done!

Has anyone set their new year's resolutions yet?

I for one wish I could get my boss to stop smoking.  Not that it's any of my business that he's walking down a road to cancerville, it's that his clothes and worse, his breath reeks of tobacco when he comes back inside from one of his smoke breaks.  

I mean it's literally difficult to breathe around him when he's just come back in!

As to resolutions?

I think the biggest is to practice what I preach when it comes to my health.  I KNOW what I'm supposed to eat and what I'm supposed to do to stay healthy - with the goal of living longer - but sometimes the chocolate calls my name and I have NO will power!

It doesn't help either that every time I turn around someone from work is offering me something to eat - often some high fat, low nutrient snack. And they all know I love chocolate so they try to bribe me with it!  Trying to stay in my good graces so I'll put in a good word to my boss! Ha!

Doesn't work though, he doesn't listen to me - but heck - if they're bringing free chocolate I'm not going to say no.

Ok ok!  2014 I will strive to reduce my chocolate intake by at least half.  (Baby steps here folks, baby steps!)  HA!

And since I don't have the excuse that the weather sucks, I will go walking 15 minutes a day.  At least to start.

Okay two resolutions.  I'm exhausted so I'll stop for now.  :-)

New Years resolutions Lorna already - are you trying to freak me out!!

I don't make them or least don't say them out loud as I never keep them.

But I will give it a whirl

a) Don't stress the small stuff (still working on that one)
b) Be kinder to everyone especially myself
c) Cut down on coffee (sorry George and Nespresso)
d) Drink more water, well start drinking water
e) Buy new locks for all the cupboards so that kids don't tattoo themselves, cut each others hair, play dressups with my good jewellery (still missing a diamond earring, thanks darling daughter)
f) stop abusing the oven by calling it a bloody bitch every time it burns dinner -
g) probably should stop calling other drivers stupid speeding shitface
h) teach my children not to copy Mummys bad words!

Im sure I could come up with a really long list but I only have about 1 percent chance of sticking to any of the above.

"...calling other drivers stupid speeding shitface" LMAO!

I can't say "no" to chocolate too, Lorna!

Themenis, you funny

I literally do call them that when they cut me off in traffic or go whizzing by - then tell my kids to ignore what Ive just said. My eldest always dobs me in to his Daddy.

I just came back with 6 boxes of various chocolate to give out to unexpected guests who may arrive Christmas Day, but seriously thinking of sitting down with a cup of coffee and eating them....

Glad this year is almost over too.

Not mentioning resolutions sometimes helps so not to jinx...

I've just completed my 2013 resolution: to be able to do the splits! It took some intense yoga sessions in the past few weeks to get there but I can do it!!!

Yay for Katiedot, the splits. Well I didn't make any resolutions for 2013 (not real ones that I remembered on 1st January anyhow).

I think mine for 2014 is going to have to be letting go. I should really block my ex from facebook because online stalking doesn't make me feel any better. But it's like when you've got a wobbly tooth or something and have to keep touching it - can't stop myself!

Definitely block block block - that old adage applies here, ignorance is bliss. Ask yourself why you are checking it, and if you can't come up with a good enough reason then de-friend or block. Of course add him back on when you are posting photos of you and another man lounging around in some exotic location LOL

Oh yeah the chocolate is dangerous. I understand you Lorna. I just had an overdose of chocolate again. Oh boy    

My resolution for next year...I want to start Karate. Always wanted to do that. But I have to find a course for adults. I don't want o get beaten up by teenagers...if you know what I mean    

But Nicky what if you ended up better than the teenagers? Then you could kick their ass instead! Parents of surly teens would be able to live vicarious through your exploits!

Katiedot - block, block, block and then some. If the jerk was stupid enough to let you go then why they hell would you want him anyway?

Mmhh nice thought.....I like to kick someones ASS.  As smaller the ass as bigger chances for me to win. Alright, let's beat up teenagers     

Thanks for the laugh Nicky - my 3 kids run circles around me so send me some tips when you are all trained up, not that I want to karate chop them necessarily subdue them at times yes. Show them youngins what you can do

LornaDoone wrote:Katiedot - block, block, block and then some.  If the jerk was stupid enough to let you go then why they hell would you want him anyway?  

Oh, he didn't. He had to leave the country, no choice.

It's me doing the online stalking. I'm just waiting for the time I see pics of him with some woman and then I can slowly torture myself. Not really a good thing I know!

Yep but we have all been there, I think its called being a glutton for punishment, in my case quite accurate.

My nephew is somewhere in Germany now following his lovely lady back to her homeland, been back and forth between 2 countries for about 3 years now. His sister has been based in Brugge on/off for the last 8 years doing the same thing. Love takes you anywhere and everywhere...

yes   

Okay found a new years resolution I may stick too or try very hard

Not going to waste anymore energy worrying about situations that haven't happened. May as well worry about stuff when it does actually turn out the way I dread....

I learned long ago not to worry about things I cannot control. The only thing I could control is how I react to it.

For instance, I learned that people who say cruel things are best laughed at.  Maybe not in their faces but I do a little chuckle inside because people who are cruel are often dealing with their own demons and the only way they know how to deal is to lash out at others.  So I just look at them as if they are children who don't understand, hope they someday find peace and count my lucky stars that I didn't turn out that way.

I also try to find the humor in situations because often, things that are so hurtful when  you're first experiencing them, later can be quite funny when you look at the absurdity of someone trying to hurt you.

Now I'm not talking about people who are abusive physically, no one can laugh through that, but people who try to verbally abuse you, those people I CAN laugh at.

Again it's all about how you react to things.  We're all marching to the end of our lives.  Do we really want to spend a lot of time worrying about things we cannot control?  Take action instead on those things that you can control.

And the last thing I ever do is blame anyone else for any goals I didn't achieve.  "Oh, I didn't get that raise cause my boss is an ass."  Well that may be true your boss may be an ass, but then you have to ask yourself,  "If I'm not valued at my present job, then why do I stay?"  And what decisions did I make in the past that have put me in a situation where I cannot leave a job or boss I despise?

We make decisions every day about what we will and will not accept in our lives and we too often use someone else as the excuse to why we can't or didn't achieve something we wanted to in our lives.  

Some will use the excuse of family obligations.  Ok that makes sense.  If you're in your 40s and realize the life you envisioned with your family didn't turn out the way you hoped.  But have you resigned yourself to continuing the status quo, or are you trying to make changes that will bring you some pockets of happiness without completely disrupting or destroying your family life?

We talk of resolutions but too often we set ourselves up to fail because we make a resolution without a plan to actually achieve it.

I say like theminis, pick one important goal for the new year, develop a plan to achieve it and then act on it.

One of the things I really like about George, (despite his horrible taste in women HA), is his ability to see something he wants to do or change, then sets about figuring out how to do that and then actually ACTING on it.

Take my resolution of walking at least 15 minutes a day.  I know in my neighborhood I wouldn't be comfortable doing that, but I have an alternative that I can use and plan to do so.  If you have the same situation there are always places like malls and parks.  Look for a local walking club - we have those in communities near mine.  Where people get together at certain times of the day and walk together.  Safety in numbers.

Humans can be very clever when they set their minds to it.  We can't control others.  All we can control is what WE do and we can control what quality of life we will accept.

Ok off the soap box.  Didn't mean to be preachy is just that I see too many women who give up their dreams to follow the dreams of their husbands, or their family expectations or the expectations of their children.  Time slips away very quickly - live in each moment, but don't give up YOUR dreams and try to carve at least a little time each day for YOU.

I totally endorse everything you say, Lorna. Brilliantly put. And moving me to tears....

 

Very well said Lorna I so agree   

Again wise wonderful words from you Lorna. I figured the reason I wasn't keeping my resolutions was I make up too many - so will stick to one -

So I will be very present and re-write the thoughts in my head and manage how I react to them so that I will stop adding stress to my own life unnecessarily and have a better chance of continuing this change I want to make.

Im also going to go back to writing daily to/do lists to keep everything on track - but to/do lists with a difference, more a checklist to remind myself of what really matters, what I need to do to keep my resolutions etc etc. Ive always functioned at my peak when challenged so here goes, bring on 2014.

To make a decision, before 6th of January.  

It is something I have to do, so safe to say...

I believe in realistic resolutions so I never resolve to do anything that isn't feasible. The whole lose weight/get fit thing never works so there's no reason to expect it to work this time round either.

Best to concentrate on something that will work and then you don't beat yourself up for being such a failure.

My 2014 resolution is to learn how to whistle between my fingers (you know how hotel doormen whistle for a taxi with thumb and forefinger in their mouth?).

I don't do new year's resolutions. Always found them to be a waste of time. Saw others forget all about theirs and just fall back on wahtever they had going before, or continue with old program, and I make plans I know I will do or stick by anyway. Never needed to have a resolution set. I just auto know what I am doing or will do.

If I thought of some way to improve on something, I just went ahead and did it. New years, is the start of a new year for me, but also a continuance of life and everything that matters. Mostly calendar observation to me, the dates that chnaged and event days. Think maybe my too practical side gets in my way a lot. Its already got the plan while my more imaginative side is still looking around, to see if there's a new smell in the air or new idea.

Sorry, not meaning to poop on anyone's parade... (Phart!!!) but ooohhh it does get a little windy and drafty just before the year closes...                                              

Hahaha!   You having fun with the smileys there?

But seriously, I agree with you. You either change your life or you don't change it. You don't resolve to change it. Or to misquote Yoda, "Do or don't do, there is no try".

"Or to misquote Yoda, "Do or don't do, there is no try"."


I like the quote,very nice    

Katie..."My 2014 resolution is to learn how to whistle between my fingers (you know how hotel doormen whistle for a taxi with thumb and forefinger in their mouth?)."

That'll be fun for the parrot to copy ! Lol
Make a recording for us when you perfect it ??

Resolution..2014...JOIN AN ONLINE DATING SITE !               

It's funny how everything comes together, all at once, out of the blue.....

I spend a good deal of time here, on COH, and I can't tell you how much it/you have brought into my life....   but on the Mexico thread many ppl were saying how perfect their lives are... well mine, is most definitely NOT !

I've never wanted kids or even marriage much.....but I LllOONGGG for a cuddle and a pair of warm thighs to warm my feet between.....and it just is NOT happening....

Tonight a very tipsy friend emailed to say in the early edition Sunday Newspaper Supplements, it stated that online dating made up 30% of all dates !!!!

So it is now a legitimate "art form" as it were...
No more seedy handshakes at the back of a night club   
No more longing glances at an even seedier bar...   

When you think about it, it has to produce something...but hopefully not someone I already know   

I phoned my friend straight back ... yes, yes this is what I need.  I told her I had participated on a "forum" (she didn't even ask what about) and I liked it ! 

My mates husband was on the computer looking stuff up as we spoke and there are millions of sites.

I am going to concentrate my search to London, where said friend lives... and I won't bumb into the Local Priest and be the talk of the Parish.

Also, on a practical level, I am in and out of London almost weekly... and it's a bigger "pond"   

If any kind soul knows of a good dating website let me know.... I am so excited it feels like Christmas all over again ...  

Some useful information here about online dating sites.
It was discussed on BBC Radio 5 live the other morning with a relationship expert. It's obviously becoming a respected method of meeting new friends.

http://www.marieclaire.co.uk/blogs/suzannah-ramsdale/541693/the-11-best-online-dating-sites.html



Useful tips here too.
Maybe search for as many tips as possible before starting the project ?
Good Luck.   


http://www.elle.com/life-love/sex-relationships/online-dating-tips-women-guide

Ahh thanks JO... your a true mate   

I will take your advice...do research and gather tips before I "launch myself Off"

I'm hoping for take off online by 6 January, Little Christmas.

My friends in London estimate 50 messages produces 1 meet for coffee

and 50 coffee's produces I legit date...... so it's a marathon not a sprint.

But I enjoy THIS community, here on COH, so much, especially when I travel, that I think the msg stuff will be very easy...

The meet for coffee not so easy...
I might suggest Heathrow - the exits are clearly marked and a mass of CCTV ...

I've got to stop that right now.. imagining that I will only attract random nutters!

Why not a "tulip head" for me too... XXX

good luck honey! you are a special woman
you will find soon your  mate !   

Well reporters showed once an interesting documentation on TV about online dating. Today it is a big money machine. The statistic said only 3% end up in a relation ship through online dating. The rest is just spending money or just dating or/and making friends. Online dating make Millions and Millions in revenue.Few of my friends do online dating for years so far they haven't met the guy yet it is only dating. Guess depends what you are looking for. Good luck, I hope you belong to the 3%   

Thanks It's me and Nicky... don't know if I'm looking for forever, because never have before ...

Just want to sing a different song ... I am living in 2014 ... might as well participate in the age I live in ..... Interesting times....  


I'll keep you in the Love Loop .......

The main thing is obviously to keep safe, always meet in a public place and have a "get away early" plan in mind.
On the radio one lady said she went to the loo, came back with her phone in her hand saying she'd had a text from a friend needing her help straight away.
There are many other options

The second thing is to have no high expectations, difficult to do, but to hope to increase your social circle.
Any thing else would then be a bonus.

Obviously the online dating sites are used by married men looking for....whatever.

Yeah that and don't forget the professional Mafia who is setting up fake profiles with fake pictures to get in contact with lonely woman and after a while chatting and talking on the phone they start asking for money like they need help with this and that.....For example let's say it is an american or english but in the army and based in Iraq or so. He can only talk to you over the phone and after a while maybe he need some money to go back home or his father is sick or whatever.....They do have perfect accents like the nationality they present.
Those people sit in Nigeria and once money has been paid the police can not track it back as they do close the bank account and profile after they got the money. This is a problem for years.

So when ever you start liking someone there and you are in regular contact for a while and you got asked for money. Watch out.

Oh dear Nicky...we'll be putting her off
the idea Big Time. Lol

Yeah I was thinking the same when I clicked on send LOL. Better to keep quite now  

Good advice Nicky - there was an Australian woman on TV here recently who lost all her savings to a Nigerian dating scam. She fell hook line and sinker, was a bit naïve in my opinion however she was sad and lonely for quite awhile and was taken advantage of. So yes be cautious.

If I ever get that lonely I'll just rescue a dog from the pound.

As to resolutions, well I did my 15 minutes of walking today. Actually did half an hour so it's one foot in front of the other, one day at a time.

It did help that the weather today is absolutely gorgeous! It's 76 degrees and sunny! Just lovely!

Funny, you started your resolution in the old year. You really couldn't wait...hehe

But after Christmas it feels already like a new year already   

Yes, well someone up thread made the point that there's no need to wait for a new year to start changing your life so I took that to heart.

thank you ladies, you have made me laugh. I am not one to have new years resolutions and just reading yours put a smile on my face. I have had a bad year where I have had depression and am getting out of it slowly, so thank you very much.    

Well then Margaret here's a toast to you for an even healthier and happier 2014 - be kind to yourself and you will get where you need to be  

big   hugs Margareth!

LornaDoone wrote:Yes, well someone up thread made the point that there's no need to wait for a new year to start changing your life so I took that to heart.

Very true! I also re-started my evening walks last week.

@ all the Girls who posted with concerns....

Thank you so much for all your concerns ... I take everything onboard and will be super careful  It's good to be suspicious of 'NEW WAYS".... and I was suspicious, just a few days ago....

Now I think this is "relationship" future....

I have a good friend who describes disappointments as "little deaths"  and they are! The "little deaths" will come, I know, and be worth it, to feel alive.

Looking at George hiding behind a palm tree in Cabo probably took 20 seconds for most of you... for me it lasted 20 minutes(and some).... Little deaths maybe quicker....

But I will always look at the man hiding behind the palm tree, he calms me, without seeing me.... and I don't know why.


Love to all X

the same here hon