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WAKE UP CALL

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WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Wed Aug 22 2012, 12:05

I know a guy
who need a good
wake up call

beware
great brain
big personality
not an easy kind

obviously
it's a matter of
Give Flowers

thanks to all
who would like to
answer
and help me



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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Maggy on Wed Aug 22 2012, 12:52

Hm... scratch

I'll catch you later with this one.

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Best in Category on Wed Aug 22 2012, 15:50

I am aware, based on yesterday's feedback I am not a right person to give any advice for the matter.

Difficult one.
“Rise and shine” would work for me or anything else, doesn't matter
It is the thought that counts, "Good morning" is good too, if the caller is the kind that makes me drop the phone when I hear his voice.... Embarassed
but men are different.
I would not call. No.

If you are where he is sleeping then it is easy.
Many pleasant ways to wake him up. Halo





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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Wed Aug 22 2012, 16:00

thanks Best
but I think you missed the point....

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Best in Category on Wed Aug 22 2012, 16:12

I did?

So you know a guy
he needs wake up call
=difficult person
It's a matter of - yes here I probably missed the point, It is a matter of what ? Right kind of flowers - no?



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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Lakin460 on Wed Aug 22 2012, 16:42

it's me, is the wake up call a reference to the man needing a reality check; a jolt of some kind that opens his eyes to what he otherwise is choosing not to see?

I may be waxing too theoretical here....

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Wed Aug 22 2012, 16:48

I can't go plenty of details
but
no
no flowers

it's a matter of
time

and definitively losing
(figuratively, beware)


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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Wed Aug 22 2012, 16:50

Lakin460 wrote:it's me, is the wake up call a reference to the man needing a reality check; a jolt of some kind that opens his eyes to what he otherwise is choosing not to see?

yes

it's me
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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Lakin460 on Wed Aug 22 2012, 17:13

and you love this brilliant difficult man? you must or you wouldn't have posted for help...

can be tough, for sure. my experience has been to rely on the Almighty for intervention, as only He knows exactly how to get someone's attention and turn them around. so if you're a praying woman, on your knees is the place ot be. sorry, but it's the best I got, dear.


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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Best in Category on Wed Aug 22 2012, 17:15

But that is something he has to do on his own?

New question arose: what means definitively losing? Not connected to the reality check, the wake up call. We can't make up for lost time, not now, not ever. It's gone. it's like "if you missed the train I am on..."

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Maggy on Wed Aug 22 2012, 17:25

To live, to cry, to love, to die . . . what is our purpose

Make up your mind=wake up call



Last edited by Maggy on Sat Aug 25 2012, 07:04; edited 1 time in total

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Maggy on Wed Aug 22 2012, 17:31

Cemeteries are not built for the dead but for the living

to remind us where we want to be and who we want to be,

What do we want to leave behind=wake up call

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Wed Aug 22 2012, 17:32

wait wait wait

(his mantra, btw)

so it's all in the Almighty hands?

good
so I stretch out here
waiting for Him to feed me and pay the bills

right?

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Best in Category on Wed Aug 22 2012, 17:38

Lakin has a point, but maybe not all is in the almighty hands.
Rather fatalistic view. What happens is meant to happen. My karma ran over your dogma...etc. Very Happy

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Wed Aug 22 2012, 17:39

Best in Category wrote:But that is something he has to do on his own?

New question arose: what means definitively losing? Not connected to the reality check, the wake up call. We can't make up for lost time, not now, not ever. It's gone. it's like "if you missed the train I am on..."

yes, on his own
bec when I offered for help
the answers were
''you can't understand''
and had no more
explanations


and I know Best, I know
lost time is lost

but when you say (when you keep saying)
better no more losing time
why
not make a change?

I'm fighting against a mountain
I know

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Maggy on Wed Aug 22 2012, 17:50

There are no words to describe what I want to do to you! Beaten


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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Wed Aug 22 2012, 17:54

good

it means something to me

thanks

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Maggy on Wed Aug 22 2012, 18:00

Next time, (if there is a next time),

don't discus me HERE! (entiendes, loca!)

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Wed Aug 22 2012, 18:01

darling
as much as I know
you are a lovely lady

I was talking about a M A N


(BTW loca means...?)


Last edited by it's me on Wed Aug 22 2012, 18:02; edited 1 time in total

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Maggy on Wed Aug 22 2012, 18:02

Right Beaten Censored

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by amaretti on Wed Aug 22 2012, 18:03

That's all you are hired for .

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Wed Aug 22 2012, 18:04

okok

let's calm down
or what you want is
Kat to shut down this thread?

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Best in Category on Wed Aug 22 2012, 18:04

Maybe it is not relevant to understand or try to change everything but approve.
So you are at this junction in life with him.

You can't solve your past and all the decisions you have made, in a moment. Change is difficult, hurtful and ultimate, but possible.

Time is cruel and is ticking at the same phase for all of us.


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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Maggy on Wed Aug 22 2012, 18:06

it's me wrote:darling
as much as I know
you are a lovely lady

I was talking about a M A N


(BTW loca means...?)
google it! Angry

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Wed Aug 22 2012, 18:07

Best in Category wrote:Maybe it is not relevant to understand or try to change everything but approve.
So you are at this junction in life with him.

You can't solve your past and all the decisions you have made, in a moment. Change is difficult, hurtful and ultimate, but possible.

Time is cruel and is ticking at the same phase for all of us.


it's a difficult

difficult time for me


thanks for your help


(I did

crazy was the result)

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Katiedot on Thu Aug 23 2012, 05:31

Two of the hardest lessons in life: you can't make someone love you and you can't change another person.


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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Thu Aug 23 2012, 07:32

so true

but
I feel myself as
the stupid woman
who listen
to the
keep promising guy

and I want no more

so
the last chance


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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by theminis on Thu Aug 23 2012, 10:20

Do not feel stupid, you are not stupid - love can and often does make a fool of everyone at one point or another - you seem like a kind person who does not give up easily on others - very admirable. Remember - actions speak louder than words - when this person shows you a difference rather than promising one - then that may be the time when you give one last chance - just a thought - hope it helps.

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Thu Aug 23 2012, 11:45

when this person shows you a difference

I can agree
but
it's needing a REALLY DIFFERENCE

shown RIGHT DIRECTLY TOWARDS ME
not random ppl



anyway
my last thought is
probably
this wake up call

is
right
to
me

not for him

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by melbert on Thu Aug 23 2012, 16:26

it's me wrote:

is
right
to
me
And, there is your answer, It's Me. "is right to me"

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Thu Aug 23 2012, 17:22

you mean you agree?
as the wake up call
is for me

mmmm?


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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Best in Category on Thu Aug 23 2012, 17:52

How confusing topic - I usually understand something, but now I have to say it beats me.

One book once started " she is not her, and he is not him and they are not them..."

Can\'t read it!

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Thu Aug 23 2012, 18:22

interesting

title?

did you write it? Very Happy

sorry... a joke!

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Best in Category on Thu Aug 23 2012, 20:05

Can't recall the title.
Been eating too much lettuce lately - it weakens the memory and everything...

I could have wrote it. It was pretty good -- maybe one day... Wink

Bed time for me - need to fix this sleeping problem. I am going to take a hike literally. Hiking to the mountains this weekend, up and down - should make me tired... Very Happy
Buona notte Good night

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by theminis on Thu Aug 23 2012, 21:49

it's me wrote:you mean you agree?
as the wake up call
is for me

mmmm?


It's me - yes, in a sense you too are having your own type of wake up call, as in you are reaching a point where you have to choose which direction to take

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Thu Aug 23 2012, 23:12



this like?

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Thu Aug 23 2012, 23:13

Best in Category wrote:Can't recall the title.
Been eating too much lettuce lately - it weakens the memory and everything...

I could have wrote it. It was pretty good -- maybe one day... Wink

Bed time for me - need to fix this sleeping problem. I am going to take a hike literally. Hiking to the mountains this weekend, up and down - should make me tired... Very Happy
Buona notte Good night


lettuce
I like it

eaten today me too! Thumbs up!

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by theminis on Thu Aug 23 2012, 23:50

it's me wrote:

this like?

Yes like that, indecision is the worst, doing nothing changes nothing. I think once you work out your direction then you will find some clarity - hope that helps.

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Thu Aug 23 2012, 23:54

I'm struggling
from a looong time

hope to come to an end
soon

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by LornaDoone on Fri Aug 24 2012, 03:53

wow it's me - been there done that. Letting go is difficult but I agree with theminis - until YOU let go he'll still have power over you and will have the ability to hurt you.

Once I no longer gave a damn, nothing he did or said made any difference and I was able to look at him dispassionately. And the experience made me stronger - I no longer am suckered into a relationships with the wrong people.




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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Fri Aug 24 2012, 08:23

thanks Lorna

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Best in Category on Fri Aug 24 2012, 08:34

You said it LornaDoone: We can give those wake up calls to ourselves. No idea what struggle is going on with It’s me… ? But let’s hope it ends rather sooner than later.

BUT

I have a question. How to avoid wrong people then? That doesn’t put you back to square one?

Any info needed & appreciated!! I dunno

You know, if you are in an event, no matter what it is and there are lots of people, and you are a jerk magnet. He recognizes you (they are masters in recognizing), approaches and since neither of you is expecting nor looking for anything – you have a verbal Ping-Pong with him, enough to trap you… here you go and what gives? Meanwhile your friends with goals and agenda find their future husbands like that... yeah, and we are happily here on the message boards Very Happy

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by LornaDoone on Sat Aug 25 2012, 17:31

how to avoid wrong people?

Background check!

No seriously, I realized that there are signs. He seems too good to be true then he probably is.

Any type of secretiveness or evasiveness on certain topics or questions that others would find innocuous.

If your friends have issues with him. I know that younger gals may resent you being with someone who would take time away from them and therefore, might have a tendency to trash the guy - but your more mature women who are true friends and sense somethings not right, will tell you.

Your gut. Really, deep down we often know when someone is not right for us but we push down that feeling and go in anyway for a variety of reasons.

I think too many women "settle" perhaps afraid of being alone and don't really take pause when we should.

I think that book by Steve Harvey is very insightful. I also saw the movie and the points they made were pretty good.

Anyway, I think the most telling is if YOU are mourning a breakup or a problem in a relationship and the guy doesn't feel that way or is insensitive to it then maybe he's just not the right person anyway, so why keep beating yourself up?

People who are breaking up after a long-term relationship may be feeling a mid-life crisis. Perhaps having made the wrong decision many years before (or made a decision based on the expectations of others including the sig other and/or family) and then feeling that they need to do the things that THEY had wanted to do but felt they gave up for the relationship or for what had been expected of them.

No easy answers. But I think following your gut is best.

A person who is not happy with you is not someone whose mind you're going to change. If they stay they will still be unhappy. Why would you want to be with some sour puss who blames you for his unhappiness?

And why would you want to beat yourself up trying to please that person or try to "make them happy" when in reality you have no influence in that area - not really. If a person is determined to be unhappy there really is nothing you can do.

Where this becomes really sad is couples with children. No one is going to walk away without getting hurt - but how you handle YOUR part is the only thing you can control.

So how to avoid the wrong people? Really has to go back to you really know who you are and what you want. If you start there, maybe you won't make the wrong choices in the first place and if you do, maybe you'll be aware of it much more quickly than in the past and move on sooner.

I know not the best advice for everyone - makes you sound like a quitter but really there are just some relationships that are not worth fighting for!

And all of that is JUST MY OPINION!




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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by it's me on Sat Aug 25 2012, 17:35

thank you very much
a lot of to think about

but
I have to say
my case
is
no one
from the above...

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by LornaDoone on Sat Aug 25 2012, 17:58

Ok it's me. I may be misunderstanding your issue but mostly just responding to Best in Category's question.

BTW it's me - every time I see your avatar I want to go to iHop!

I may just go there tomorrow for breakfast!!! Making me hungry!

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Joanna on Sat Aug 25 2012, 18:06

Very good thoughts Lorna above.

From Hamlet.....my mantra....."To thine own self be true"

Very difficult sometimes to put into action..... but a good guide to keep in one's head.

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Katiedot on Sat Aug 25 2012, 18:12

Pining after a man who barely knows you exist is a loser's game. If he has your contact details but doesn't contact you, then it's because he's just not that into you.

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by melbert on Sat Aug 25 2012, 18:31

Lorna, Joanna, Katie - true, true, true!!!!

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by Best in Category on Sun Aug 26 2012, 22:35

Thank you LornaDoone! I agree with everything you wrote.

Gut feeling and that some relationships just are not worth fighting for.

Tell me about it...But if it is the other way around: he doesn't let me go?

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Re: WAKE UP CALL

Post by LornaDoone on Sun Aug 26 2012, 23:26

Best in Category wrote:Thank you LornaDoone! I agree with everything you wrote.

Gut feeling and that some relationships just are not worth fighting for.

Tell me about it...But if it is the other way around: he doesn't let me go?

Restraining Order? Move? Sorry still in a silly mood.

But seriously, if he's getting creepy and your gut tells you he may hurt you a restraining order won't help. Depending on how serious it could be - moving would be an option.

I had a friend who worked with battered women and she once told me a that a restraining order won't stop a bullet. Bit dramatic but she made the point. That if it's that serious the only thing to do is to get as far away from the person as possible even if it means moving. I've read too many stories lately of women getting killed by ex-spouses or ex-boyfriends who didn't want to let go.

There is something inherently wrong with people who feel that only that one person can make them happy to the point that they want to hurt the person they are supposed to "love" if they break up.


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Re: WAKE UP CALL

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