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Post by Joanna on Fri 17 Aug 2012, 15:42

The Mars Lander has Landed....

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Post by cindigirl on Fri 17 Aug 2012, 18:41

Video comedien Tim Hawkins - on babies, marriage, teenagers and yes, Starbucks.



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Post by cindigirl on Fri 17 Aug 2012, 18:58

Another funny vid - Tim Hawkins - on aging and turning 40.



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Post by Joanna on Fri 17 Aug 2012, 20:45

Men are SUCH cowards about their eyes 1 out of 10 lol!
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Post by Best in Category on Fri 17 Aug 2012, 21:47

Couple were having a fierce argument. She thought she had the last word telling him to "Kiss my ass"!

He said: Even if I had Mick Jagger lips and all day I still couldn't finish!

I must be tired because things like that makes me laugh - buona notte

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Post by Maggy on Fri 17 Aug 2012, 22:33

lol! Bic.
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Post by pattygirl on Fri 17 Aug 2012, 23:58


Good for the brain...it may take a minute for the light to shine...
but the mental exercise will be good for you!

1. ARBITRATOR: A cook that leaves Arby's to work at McDonald

2. AVOIDABLE: What a bullfighter tries to do

3. BERNADETTE: The act of torching a mortgage

4. BURGLARIZE: What a crook sees with

5. CONTROL: A short, ugly inmate

6. COUNTERFEITERS: Workers who put together kitchen cabinets

7. ECLIPSE: What an English barber does for a living

8. EYEDROPPER: A clumsy ophthalmologist

9. HEROES: What a guy in a boat did

10. LEFT BANK: What the robber did when his bag was full of money

11. MISTY: How golfers create divots

12. PARADOX: Two physicians

13. PARASITES: What you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower

14. PHARMACIST: A helper on the farm

15. POLARIZE: What penguins live on

16. PRIMATE: Removing your spouse from in front of the TV!

17. RELIEF: What trees do in the spring

18. RUBBERNECK: What you do to relax your wife

19. SELFISH: What the owner of a seafood store does

20. SUDAFED: Brought litigation against a government official








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Post by melbert on Sat 18 Aug 2012, 02:10

Yay PattyGirl! Those are great! Are you feeling better? I hope so!!
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Post by Best in Category on Sat 18 Aug 2012, 08:41

Pattygirl - funny list cheers


Friday night talk

Some days ago my phone received a text from him. Message said: ?

One message is 160 marks, it costs the same if there is one or 160 marks. Still he is being economic with his words.

It has been about a month I last spoke with him. We do not have a relationship of any kind nor there is going to be one.

For a question like that it takes time to answer. So I thought about two days what to text back and finally knew but forgot to send it.

Last night, midnight, he called. Number was forbidden, so I answered, didn’t know it was him.

Conversation went like this:

- (my name) where are you?
- In bed.
- Who’s bed?
- My own.
- What are you wearing?
- I am not going to tell.
- It is a big secret?
- It is.
- Why didn’t you answer my text?
- I have been busy.
- Lie me more.
- No.
- Even lies are a secret?
- Yes.
- Tell me anything
- ….hmmmm… I was just reading about censorship in public libraries. And how they select books there… really interesting….
- You can’t find Hitler’s Mein Kampf, can you?
- Probably not and many many others
- How about magazines?
- Magazines yes.
- How about porn? Do they have porn? Let me tell you here in this hotel they don’t . CNN, national geographic, BBC… no porn….
- Don’t try, you have your laptop, so… and article was not about that! But about L I T E R A T U R E, how certain books do not end up in to the library shelves.
- Other girls would have taken the hint.
- What hint?
- Never mind. We live in totally different planets. Is it possible for these planets to collide next week?
- Why?
- Because I would really like to discuss in depth about the public library censorship issue with you.
- I don’t know. I don’t date. It was GAME OVER for me years ago. Why don’t you ask someone who can follow hints?
- I ask them too, if you ask me to.
- Go ahead.
- You are really making this my very own mein kampf – aren’t you?
- Not making anything – do not read too much into this.
- Tuesday at 12 you are going to have a lunch with me. Wear teflon, you are going to need it. Good night.

And he hung up.

I know this is not humorous but pathetic. Glad I have dentist on Tuesday, force majeure, you know.

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Post by it's me on Sat 18 Aug 2012, 11:57

funny Very Happy

what was teflon for? scratch
unassailable?
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Post by Best in Category on Sat 18 Aug 2012, 12:17

I have no idea. Never heard it before "wear teflon"... unassailable maybe or that the material has high melting point or who knows what.

And I won't know because I am going to the dentist for sure. Very Happy


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Post by it's me on Sat 18 Aug 2012, 15:08

huh... also the high melting point is an interesting option Very Happy

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Post by Joanna on Sat 18 Aug 2012, 16:14

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Post by it's me on Sat 18 Aug 2012, 21:13

LOOOOOL!!!
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Post by amaretti on Sat 18 Aug 2012, 22:40

Heheheheee

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Post by Joanna on Sun 19 Aug 2012, 01:05

JOKES and ALL THINGS HUMOROUS - Page 11 Charli10
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Post by it's me on Sun 19 Aug 2012, 08:35

ohhhmy... !!
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Post by Best in Category on Sun 19 Aug 2012, 11:34

An American visits Bucharest in a cab. They pass by the government building:
- What’s this big building? asks the American.

- It’s the Palace of the Government, sir.

- And how long did it take to build it?

- About 10 years!

- That’s a long time…We would have finished it in 2 years! You know, we have a more advanced technology!
The cab driver says nothing. They drive some more and the American asks again:
- What is this building?
- It’s the Town Hall, sir!

- And how long did it take to build it?

- About 6 months!

- That’s a long time We would have finished it in 2 months.
The cab driver can barely contain himself. They get to the People’s Palace
- Ooooh my god, but what is this building?

- I don’t know. It wasn’t here yesterday.

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Post by it's me on Sun 19 Aug 2012, 12:15

LOOOOOOL !!!!
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Post by pattygirl on Mon 20 Aug 2012, 02:19



Subject: Don't wash your hair in the shower

It's so good to finally get a health warning that is useful!!!

IT INVOLVES THE SHAMPOO WHEN IT RUNS
DOWN YOUR BODY WHEN YOU SHOWER WITH IT!!!!
WARNING TO US ALL!!!
Shampoo Warning!
I don't know WHY I didn't figure this out sooner!
I use shampoo in the shower!
When I wash my hair, the shampoo runs down my whole body,
And printed very clearly on the shampoo label is this warning:
"FOR EXTRA BODY AND VOLUME"
No wonder I have been gaining weight!
Well! I have gotten rid of that shampoo and I am going to
Start showering with Dawn dish soap instead.
Its label reads:
"DISSOLVES FAT THAT IS OTHERWISE DIFFICULT TO REMOVE."
Problem solved!
If I don't answer the phone I'll be in the shower!
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Post by pattygirl on Mon 20 Aug 2012, 02:25


And I thought I had no retirement skills...

The importance of having an occupation after retirement. As we get older we sometimes begin to doubt our ability to "make a difference" in the world. It is at these times that our hopes are boosted by the remarkable achievements of other "seniors" who have found the courage to take on challenges that would make many of us wither.

Harold Schlumberg is such a person:



THIS IS QUOTED FROM HAROLD: "I've often been asked, 'What do you do now that you're retired?' Well...I'm fortunate to have a chemical engineering background and one of the things I enjoy most is converting beer, wine and whisky into urine. It's rewarding, uplifting, satisfying and fulfilling. I do it every day and I really enjoy it." Harold should be an inspiration to us all.
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Post by it's me on Mon 20 Aug 2012, 08:36

HAHAHAHAHA!!! really good the last one
the final surprise is well done! Thumbs up!
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Post by Lakin460 on Mon 20 Aug 2012, 17:48

JOKES and ALL THINGS HUMOROUS - Page 11 Mayan_10
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Post by Best in Category on Mon 20 Aug 2012, 20:52

Lakin: isn't it nostradamus prophecies? It really has freaked some folks... Very Happy

Money Talks! Love7

During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the pastor with an unusual offer:

"Look, I'll give you $100 if you'll change the wedding vows. When you get to the part where I'm supposed to promise to 'love, honor and obey' and 'be faithful to her forever,' I'd appreciate it if you'd just leave that out."

He passed the minister a $100 bill and walked away satisfied.

On the day of the wedding, when it came time for the groom's vows, the pastor looked the young man in the eye and said: "Will you promise to prostrate yourself before her, obey her every command and wish, serve her breakfast in bed every morning of your life, and swear eternally before God and your lovely wife that you will not ever even look at another woman, as long as you both shall live?"

The groom gulped and looked around, and said in a tiny voice, "Yes," then leaned toward the pastor and hissed: "I thought we had a deal."

The pastor put a $100 bill into the groom's hand and whispered: "She made me a better offer."

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Post by Lakin460 on Mon 20 Aug 2012, 20:58

BiC, it was the Mayan calendar that caused the buzz about the world ending in Dec. 2012. It predates Nostradamus, (no pun intended.....)
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Post by Best in Category on Mon 20 Aug 2012, 21:14

You are right, Thanks Lakin! Very Happy

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Post by Best in Category on Mon 20 Aug 2012, 21:49

Help! I turned into "Clooneyfan". I don't like change. Just got used to being "getting serious about..."

Early morning tomorrow and I am here goofing around insomniac...

Sleep Buona notte a tutti

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Post by it's me on Mon 20 Aug 2012, 23:40

buona notte
Best!
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Post by Joanna on Tue 21 Aug 2012, 10:25

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Post by it's me on Tue 21 Aug 2012, 10:28

cat funny!
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Post by cindigirl on Tue 21 Aug 2012, 14:51

An elderly man walks into a confessional. The following conversation ensues:

Man: 'I am 92 years old, have a wonderful wife of 70 years, many children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren. Yesterday, I picked up two college girls, hitch-hiking. We went to a motel, where I had sex with each of them three times.'

Priest: 'Are you sorry for your sins?'
Man: 'What sins?'
Priest: 'What kind of a Catholic are you?'
Man: 'I'm Jewish.'
Priest: 'Why are you telling me all this?'
Man: 'I'm 92 years old ..... I'm telling everybody!'
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
An elderly man goes into a brothel and tells the madam he would like a young girl for the night. Surprised, she looks at the ancient man and asks how old he is. 'I'm 90 years old,' he says.
'90!' replies the woman. 'Don't you realize you've had it?' 'Oh, sorry,' says the old man. 'How much do I owe you?'
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Wife: 'What are you doing?'
Husband: Nothing.
Wife: 'Nothing...? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.'
Husband: 'I was looking for the expiration date.'
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Girl: 'When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden.'
Boy: 'It's very kind of you, darling, but I don't have any worries or troubles.'
Girl: 'Well that's because we aren't married yet.'
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Son: 'Mum, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.' Mom: 'Well, you have done the right thing.' Son: 'But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap.'
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A wife asked her husband: 'What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?' He looked at her from head to toe and replied: 'I like your sense of humor!'
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A man was sitting reading his papers when his wife hit him round the head with a frying pan. 'What was that for?' the man asked. The wife replied 'That was for the piece of paper with the name Jenny on it that I found in your pants pocket'.. The man then said 'When I was at the races last week Jenny was the name of the horse I bet on' the wife apologized and went on with the housework.. Three days later the man is watching TV when his wife bashes him on the head with an even bigger frying pan, knocking him unconscious. Upon re-gaining consciousness the man asked why she had hit again. Wife replied.. 'Your horse phoned'
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Let us pray.....................
Give me a sense of humor, Lord,
Give me the grace to see a joke,
To get some humor out of life,
And pass it on to other folks.






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Post by Best in Category on Tue 21 Aug 2012, 20:51

Tuesday’s date bypassed (this is not an internet joke, I am afraid.)

I didn’t show up. Simple. He called.

- Hello!
- Hi
- I had a lunch
- good?
- It was good and it was plenty, it was for TWO.
- Sorry, I had a dentist appointment.
- You did? How did it go?
- It went well. I learned a lot.
- About what?
- He had all the newest equipment. Also new assistant. I think there was something going on there...
- Why is that?
- He told about his vacation. Then he explained that he had been there with his sons, who have a mother, and that they are not separated.
- What a suspicious way of telling he is married with kids.
- Must have been because of his assistant
- or you
- … no not me. And I was curious to know about differences in dental care and cosmetic dentistry in different countries.
- What are you saying? As a professional he should have taken you straight to the chair. Immedeately insert all the needed equipment to you mouth and start working. Not chatting with you and revealing details about his personal life, showing his tools and having a presentation about cosmetic dentistry past, present and future in the world. Just how many patients time he gave you? 3?
- It was just checking and cleaning I have every 6 months. X-rays, flour and protective paste… like that
- Any other abnormalities today?
- Does talking to you count?
- It does, unless you sit on my lap when we talk.
- Not going to happen.
- Not today. Because I have to catch the evening flight again – that’s what I do, you know.
- It is never going to happen. Bon voyage!
- I don’t know when I’ll be around next time, could be in 6 months…will your project be finished by then? I guess I will call…
- Don’t. My boyfriend wouldn’t like it.
- Boyfriend???
- Yes
- And who the hell is he, the dentist?
- I don’t know yet, there are options.
- Sure. (laughing) I am your option. ANY regular guy would take off faster than Usain Bolt here.
- You don’t know.
- I do.
- No you don’t. There are some determined men with drive and dare out there.
- Have you often these type of hallucinations?
- Not necessarily.
- SERIOUSLY, I wanted to see you and talk with you, to catch up…before thermal fall sets in
- When is it? Is it when I can’t have morning coffee outside in my terrace?
- Yes thermal seasons follow your breakfast habits, not calendar. How long you are going to carry this on?
- I have things here I need to do – bye!
- Wait, now wait a second! -- What are you doing tonight?
- Homing.
- Just listen to me! Of course you do as you like, but --While you are homing try to learn how to behave more like a woman. It would make your life a lot more easier.
- ? --Like how? Do you have a book recommendation for it?
- Here is my recommendation! You and your goddamn books – BURN them!!! Practise saying Yes, Yes I do, Yes that sounds fun, what time and where I can meet you, I don’t know, can you help me? Yes I would like that. BE RECEPTIVE. You could start from these – Ok TTYL to see if any of this made a difference… take care, bye!
- -- Bye


I guess I had an informative day all together. I had to do what I did. It kind of feels a bit lonely now and then… Better this way, I think.

Maybe there were some general tips for women… Rolling Eyes

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Post by it's me on Tue 21 Aug 2012, 21:02

RECEPTIVE?
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Post by Best in Category on Tue 21 Aug 2012, 21:12

Yes.
See how fast I learn, without practising Very Happy

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Post by cindigirl on Wed 22 Aug 2012, 20:33

To Be 8 again!

A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, watching his wife, who was looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not far off he asked what she'd like to have for her birthday.

'I'd like to be eight again', she replied, still looking in the mirror ..

On the morning of her Birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl of CocoPuffs, and then took her to Adventure World theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Roller Coaster, everything there was.

Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down. He then took her to a McDonald's where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a chocolate shake.

Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop, and her
favorite candy, M&M's. What a fabulous adventure!

Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed exhausted.

He leaned over his wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, 'Well Dear, what was it like being eight again?

Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed .

'I meant my dress size, you Retard!!!!'

The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he is gonna get it wrong.

SEND THIS TO ALL THE MEN &WOMEN WHO NEED A LAUGH.



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Post by Joanna on Wed 22 Aug 2012, 20:43

Good one cindi....LOL


Men are like a fine wine.

They start out like grapes.
It's our job to stomp them, and then keep them in the dark
until they mature.

And hopefully they'll turn out to be something
we would like to have dinner with.
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Post by cindigirl on Wed 22 Aug 2012, 20:52

LOL Joanna - I like the way you think. lip smack

And they say men rule the world. Which explains the kind of shape the world is in right now.
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Post by Best in Category on Wed 22 Aug 2012, 21:39

Funny ones Very Happy

FOR SALE BY OWNER
Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica.
45 volumes.
Excellent condition.
$ 1.000.00 or best offer.
No longer needed.
Got married last weekend.
Wife knows everything.

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Post by Maggy on Wed 22 Aug 2012, 23:28

A man goes to a shrink and says, "Doctor, my wife is unfaithful to me. Every evening, she goes to Larry's bar and picks up men. In fact, She sleeps with anybody who asks her! I'm going crazy. What do you think I should do?" "Relax," says the Doctor, "take a deep breath and calm down. Now, tell me, exactly where is Larry's bar?"
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Post by it's me on Wed 22 Aug 2012, 23:37

LOL!
it's me
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Post by Stellita on Wed 22 Aug 2012, 23:41

Very Happy

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Post by Stellita on Thu 23 Aug 2012, 05:35



One Night After Watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire... A man and his wife went to bed and the man was getting very frisky. He asked his wife if she was in the mood. His wife answered, "Not tonight dear, I have a headache." The man replied, "Is that your final answer?" She said "Yes." "OK, then I'd like to phone a friend." he replied.

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Post by it's me on Thu 23 Aug 2012, 07:48

!!!
it's me
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Post by Best in Category on Thu 23 Aug 2012, 17:45

Maggy: LOL!!!

Short with jokes today me.

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Post by Best in Category on Thu 23 Aug 2012, 18:18

But I have this. It absolutely is right at least with my first name's letter... sunny

FIND A LETTER

Seek the first letter of your name....and what a surprise....does it suit you?

A You are not particularly romantic, but you are interested in action. You mean business. With you, what you see is what you get. You have no patience for flirting and can't be bothered with someone who is trying to be coy, cute, demure, and subtly enticing. You are an up-front person. When it comes to sex, it's action that counts, not obscure hints. Your mate's physical attractivesness is important to you. You find the chase and challenge of the "hunt" envigorating. You are passionate and sexual, as well as being much more adventurous than you appear; however, you do not go around advertising these qualities. Your physical needs are your primary concern.

B You give off vibes of lazy sensuality. You enjoy being roromanced, wined, and dined. You are very happy to receive gifts as an expression of the affection of your lover. You want to be pampered and know how to pamper your mate. You are privare in your expression of endearments, and particular when it comes to lovemaking. You will hold off until everything meets with your approval. You can control your appetite and abstain from sex if need be. You require new sensations and experiences. You are will to experiment.

C You are a very social individual, and it is important to you to have a relationship. You require closeness and togetherness. You must be able to talk to your sex partner-before, during, and after. You want the object of your affection to be socially acceptable and good-looking. You see your lover as a friend and companion. You are very sexual and sensual, needing someone to appreciate and almost worship you. When this cannot be achieved, you have the ability to go for long periods without sexual activity. You are an expert at controlling your desires and doing without.

D Once you get it into your head that you want someone, you move full steam ahead in pursuit. You do not give up your quest easily. You are nurturant and caring. If someone has a problem, this turns you on. You are highly sexual, passionate, loyal, and intense in your involvements, sometimes possessive and jealous. Sex to you is a pleasure to be enjoyed. You are stimulated by the eccentric and unusual, having a free and open attitude.

E Your greatest need is to talk. If your date is not a good listener, you have trouble relating. A person must be intellectually stimulating or you are not interested sexually. You need a friend for a lover and a companion for a bedmate. You hate disharmony and disruption, but you do enjoy a good argument once in a while-it seems to stir things up. You flirt a lot, for the challenge is more important than the sexual act for you. But once you give your heart away, you are uncompromisingly loyal. When you don't have a good lover to fall asleep with, you will fall asleep with a good book. {Sometimes, in fact, you prefer a good book.)

F You are idealistic and romantic, putting your lover on a pedestal. You look for the very best mate you can find. You are a flirt, yet once committed, you are very loyal. You are sensuous, sexual, and privately passionate. Publicly, you can be showy, extravagant, and gallant. You are born romantic. Dramatic love scenes are a favorite fantasy pastime. You can be a very generous lover.

G You are fastidious, seeking perfection within yourself and your lover. You respond to a lover who is your intellectual equal or superior, and one who can enhance your status. You are sensuous and know how to reach the peak of erotic stimulation, because you work at it meticulously. You can be extremely active sexually-that is, when you find the time. Your duties and responsibilities take precedence over everything else. You may have difficulty getting emotionally close to a lover, but no trouble getting close sexually.

H You seek a mate who can enhance your reputation and your earning ability. You will be very generous to your lover once you have attained a commitment. Your gifts are actually an investment in your partner. Before the commitment, though, you tend to be frugal in your spending and dating habits, and equally cautious in your sexual involvements. You are a sensual and patient lover.

I You have a great need to be loved, appreciated... even worshipped. You enjoy luxury, sensuality, and pleasures of the flesh. You look for lovers who know what they are doing. You are not interested in an amateur, unless that amateur wants a tutor. You are fussy and exacting about having your desires satisfied. You are willing to experiment and try new modes of sexual expression. You bore easily and thus require sexual adventure and change. You are more sensual than sexual, but you are somethimes downright lustful.

J You are blessed with a great deal of physical energy. When used for love-making, there is nothing to stop you,except maybe the stamina of your partner.(you could have danced all night.) You respond to the thrill of the chase and the challenge of the mating game. You can carry on great romances in your head. At heart you are a roamer and need to set out on your own every so often. You will carry on long-distance relationships with ease. You are idealistic and need to believe in love. The sex act seems to satisfy a need to be nurtured deep within.

K You are secretive, self-contained, and shy. You are very sexy, sensual, and passionate, but you do not let on to this. Only in intimate privacy will this part of your nature reveal itself. When it gets down to the nitty-gritty, you are an expert. You know all the little tricks of the trade, can play any role or any game, and take your love life very seriously. You don't fool around. You have the patience to wait for the right person to come along.

L You can be very romantic, attached to the glamour of love. Having a partner is of paramount importance to you. You are free in your expression of love and are willing to take chances, try new sexual experiences and partners, provided it's all in good taste. Brains turn you on. You must feel that your partner is intellectually stimulating, otherwise you will find it difficult to sustain the relationship. You require loving, cuddling, wining, and dining to know that you're being appreciated.

M You are emotional and intense. When involved in a relationship, you throw your entire being into it. Nothing stops you; there are no holds barred. You are all-consuming and crave someone who is equally passionate and intense. You believe in total sexual freedom. You are willing to try anything and everything. Your supply of sexual energy is inexhaustible. You also enjoy mothering your mate.

N You may appear innocent, unassuming, and shy; but we know that appearances can lie. When it comes to sex, you are no novice but something of a skilled technician. You can easily go to extremes, though, running the gamut from insatiability to boredom with the whole idea of sex. You can be highly critical of your mate, seeking perfection in both of you. It is not easy to find someone who can meet your standards. You have difficulty expressing emotions and drawing close to lovers.

O You are very interested in sexual activities yet secretive and shy about your desires. You can rechannel much of your sexual energy into making money and/or seeking power. You can easily have extended periods of celibacy. You are a passionate, compassionate, sexual lover, requiring the same qualities from your mate. Sex is serious business; thus you demand intensity, diversity, and are willing to try anything or anyone. Sometimes your passions turn to possessiveness, which must be kept in check.

P You are very conscious of social proprieties. You wouldn't think of doing anything that might harm your image or reputation. Appearances count. Therefore, you require a good-looking partner. You also require an intelligent partner. Oddly enough, you may view your partner as your enemy...a good fight stimulates those sex vibes. You are relatively free of sexual hang-ups. You are willing to experiment and try new ways of doing things. You are very social and sensual; you enjoy flirting and need a good deal of physical gratification.

Q You require constant activity and stimulation. You have tremendous physical energy. It is not easy for a partner to keep up with you, sexually or otherwise. You are an enthusiastic lover and tend to be attracted to people of ther ethnic groups. You need romance, hearts and flowers, and lots of conversation to turn you on and keep you going.

R You are a no-nonsense, action-oriented individual. You need someone who can keep pace with you and who is your intellectual equal-the smarter the better. You are turned on more quickly by a great mind than by a great body. However, physical attractiveness is very important to you. You have to be proud of your partner. You are privately very sexy, but you do not show this outwardly. If your new lover is not all that great in bed, you are willing to serve as teacher. Sex is important; you can be a very demanding playmate.

S For you, it is business before pleasure. If you are in any way bothered by career, business, or money concerns, you find it very hard to relax and get into the mood. You can be romantically idealistic to a fault and are capable of much sensuality. But you never lose control of your emotions. You are very careful and cautious before you give your heart away-and your body, for that matter. Once you make the commitment, though, you stick like glue.

T You are very sensitive, private, and sexually passive; you like a partner who takes the lead. You get turned on by music, soft lights, and romantic thoughts. You fantasize and tend to fall in and out of love. When in love, you are romantic, idealistic, mushy, and extremely changeable. You enjoy having your senses and your feelings stimulated, titillated, and teased. You are a great flirt. You can make your relationships fit your dreams, all in your own head.

U You are enthusiastic and idealistic when in love. When not in love, you are in love with love, always looking for someone to adore. You see romance as a challenge. You are a roamer and need adventure, excitement, and freedom. You deal in potential relationships. You enjoy giving gifts and enjoy seeing your mate look good. Your sex drive is strong and you desire instant gratification. You are willing to put your partner's pleasures above your own.

V You are individualistic, and you need freedom, space, and excitement. You wait until you know someone well before committing yourself. Knowing someone means psyching him out. You feel a need to get into his head to see what makes him tick. You are attracted to eccentric types. Often there is an age difference between you and your lover. You respond to danger, thrills, and suspense. The gay scene turns you on, even though you yourself may not be a participant.

W You are very proud, determined, and you refuse to take no for an answer when pursuing love. Your ego is at stake. You are romantic, idealistic, and often in love with love itself, not seeing your partner as he or she really is. You feel deeply and throw all of yourself into your relationships. Nothing is too good for your lover. You enjoy playing love games.

X You need constant stimulation because you bore quickly. You can handle more than one relationship at a time with ease. You can't shut off your mind. You talk while you make love. You can have the greatest love affairs, all by yourself, in your own head.

Y You are sexual, sensual, and very independent. If you can't have it your way, you will forgo the whole thing. You want to control your relationships, which doesn't always work out too well. You respond to physical stimulation, enjoy necking and spending hours just touching, feeling, and exploring. However, if you can spend your time making money, you will give up the pleasures of the flesh for the moment. You need to prove to yourself and your partner what a great lover you are. You want feedback on your performance. You are an open, stimulating, fomantic bedmate.

Z You are very romantic, idealistic, and somehow you believe that to love means to suffer. You wind up serving your mate or attracting people who have unusual troubles. You see yourself as your lover's savior. You are sincere, passionate, lustful, and dreamy. You can't help falling in love. You fantasize and get turned on by movies and agazines. You do not tell others of this secret life, nor of your sexual fantasies. You are easily aroused sexually..

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Post by it's me on Thu 23 Aug 2012, 18:33

G You are fastidious Shocked


lol!
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Post by Best in Category on Thu 23 Aug 2012, 19:54

So one hit! (or second) cheers


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Post by Joanna on Sat 25 Aug 2012, 12:51

lol! Has this ever happened to anyone on here ??



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Post by melbert on Sat 25 Aug 2012, 15:42

Hey, that's a great way to pick up guys! Before she bearhugged him, that's the way I look when I fall asleep at my desk at work. Don't ask...
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Post by playfuldeb on Sun 26 Aug 2012, 11:02

the letter thing doesnt all fit. I am never jealous and that drives my BFs crazy. And I am no drama, so other people's issues do not turn me on. George turns me on . . .
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